Pre-Birthday

twenty six? are you serious? where have the years gone? didn't I just turn 16? wait a second I was just catching the wave at freshman orientation? I am on my third job? wasn't I supposed to have a herd of children by now... or wait what about at least married? I'm still working? NO that can't be... who is ironing clothes and making dinner and taking jr. to baseball practice?

I don't feel as cool as I thought I would at this age... the magicalness of the later 20's were what my imagination would scheme for me and well I don't feel so magical. I just feel like me in a grown up body. seriously I'm really not a mother? Wait.. I was on the fast track, you know the one that had you married and with child by umm like 21??? And wait my mom.. yeah I'll have what she had that would be um 3 days away from giving birth to child number 3!

But then I look into the face of my herd of children... I have 23 actually and oh man, you should have seen the excitement on their face today as one of their classmates sang happy birthday to Miss Grant over the intercom for the WHOLE school to hear..... "You didn't even see her sneak out did you Miss Grant???" Oh and wait you need to look at my desk piled high not with papers to grade but with precious little cards drawn on wide-ruled notebook paper with pictures of cakes and parties and lots of I love yous and you are the best teacher written in crayon. Oh my little imagination at age 8, 9, and 10 couldn't even fathom this for a second. Oh yes, I do desire more than anything to have my own children, yet isn't the reason why I left the three sided cube and the monotony of climbing the proverbial ladder to be somewhere where I was needed? And in all actuality I do have children fighting over me to be their mother..."I wish Miss Grant was my mom" "She's my mom" "Nuh uh, she's my mom"..... "Miss Grant's EVERYONE'S mom".

Oh God, how can I doubt or even think for a second that I'm not right smack dab in the center of Your plan for me.

My sweet assistant went out of her way today to make my day so special... this was a portion of her sweet note to me and well it made me cry!

"Miss Grant, you are so thoughtful and kind in everything you do. May God continue to bless your tender heart and gentle hands toward these children."

Thank you Lord, for having me right where I'm supposed to be, I am humbled and honored that You chose me! I just wanted to get my foot in the door but somehow I managed to get my heart in that door too!!!!